I've been holding onto this blog, unsure if i want to post it. I think partly because i don't understand it all and it lacks organization and literary flow. But I must post what was written for you.

Of course the words have to come to me when I’m away from the comfort of my laptop. Perhaps that will formulate a more heart to heart blog. I've been thinking. I apologize if my words offend. Although offending someone is not always a bad thing. I don't want to generalize, merely comment on a statement I’ve heard before and I fear can unknowingly creep into our understanding of Africa. I will confess it has once influenced some of my thoughts and for that I beg forgiveness. I have heard it said Africa is a lost cause. I want those words to sink in. Absorb them. Do they sound familiar?

We hear the statistics of AIDS, death, poverty, etc. And really believe them because they are true. In that context I can understand how one would feel Africa is a lost cause. So much pain and suffering! I can't speak of all of Africa because Africa is a diverse continent. I can only speak of what I have seen and even then I don't understand it all. It's not like living from one pay check to the next. It's like living from one meal to the next, from one rain fall to the next, watching your family die, doing the same thing day in day out for little pay or acknowledgement. That's life! And I barely touched on the whole picture. I merely gave you a starting point.

As an environmental researcher I am here to observe and write what i see. I'm not here to teach, to change anyone, to even really alleviate any poverty. I am here to merely observe and record. A researcher has to be very careful of biases. We must save our opinions and report other people's opinions. I like observing. It allows me to learn from others and get credit for it. It's relaxing for the most part because I get to sit back and watch and learn. Well this is what I’ve learned. Africa is far from being a lost cause.

I'm not going to lie but there is a huge battle taking place in this country. But you know what! There's a war raging through our country. Are we a lost cause? Stop think about that. The most natural answer that comes to mind is no, we are one of the most desired countries to live in for many reasons, economically, socially, security wise, you fill in the blanks. Does that make us better than them? What I am trying to say is before we write off another country we need to take a hard look at the dark spots in our country.

You know what i like about Kenya? (I suspect this exists through out Africa) I love the collectiveness! I yearn for this. It's about belonging. Individualism eats away at the human fabric of society. Kenya has color, diversity, acceptance, love. I've felt love from total strangers. They don't know me, I don't know them and yet they physically open their arms to me. I feel we can learn so much from Africa. She can be our teacher if we allow ourselves to be the pupil. It's hard to allow ourselves to be a pupil when we think we know the answers already. Kenya is really a rich country, but not in the ways our western minds think. There's so much history, culture and traditional knowledge here. Who am I to preach and teach to them? I came here to be an observer and I have become a wide eyed child hungry for more.

You know I’m so thankful for this blog because it is an outlet for my opinions and biases that I have been so careful not to include in my research. I’ve thoroughly appreciated all the comments my online community has been giving. It has been very encouraging and it spurs me on. Blessings to you my friend!